The Waiting Room
by Mirrorfaced
Summary: What do the Eragon characters do when Chirs isn't writing? Rated for language. Discontinued.
1. Chapter 1

1**Waiting Room**

**Disclaimer: Me, Eragon, No own. Nor anything else.**

**I shall try to keep the attitudes the same but I will fail. Can't hold off the plot-bunnies for long. "Back! Back!" points Zar'roc at bunnies**

Eragon sat down in a soft arm-chair and punched the air with his fist. "Yes!" Saphira sat down on the carpet. _Why "yes"? _Eragon began to laugh. "Because, Chris isn't writing the story now. Or at least not my part, so I get to hang here!" Saphira found some. Some logic in her Rider. _Sure but what are you gonna do? Hang with the dead people? _The sapphire dragon pointed a claw at a group of semi-transparent people sitting at a poker table. "Brom!" Yelled Eragon. Saphira sighed, she choose the stupid one but Thorn got the sadistic one, Glaedr was trapped with elves and only three feet and Shurikan was stuck with the mad-mad. At least hers was the 'hero' of the story. Life wasn't that bad after all.

Suddenly, a red dragon and his Rider staggered to the bar in the corner of the room. "Gimmie alcohol. Give him," He pointed at the somber, red dragon. "A barrel or two." The bartender blinked but obliged. Hey, when you work at an imaginary waiting room made up by a 12 yr old at the bar for medieval characters, you see stuff. Eragon immediately waved. "Hi Murtagh!" Murtagh shook his head slowly and pretended not to notice. His dragon gave him a dazed look. _There ya go, just drink and maybe he'll go away. Saphira got the annoying one. _Murtagh returned the look. _Yea but you got the sadistic one._

Saphira, who wanted nothing to do with her sugar-high Rider, walked to join Thorn. _You suck. _The red dragon blinked and sighed. _Thanks..._ Of course, his sarcasm was wasted on the pissed, blue dragon. She continued. _Zip it, I'm not done._ She mentally growled. _How can you have even _thought_ about it? As eggs, we decided not to hatch in Galbatorix's castle anyways you over-grown hatchling!_ Thorn sighed. Saphira of course, kept on going. _I mean come-on! Not only that but _Morzan's _son! _Thorn interrupted, he got a cookie for standing up to the angry dragon. _Do you have a_ problem _with _my_ choice!? Murtagh is perfectly fine compared to Eragon! Plus, I could've hatched earlier that you. I'm younger out of my egg but my egg was laid_ _before yours!_

The two remaining Riders entered. Galbatorix with Shurikan, and Oromis with Glaedr. The gold dragon limped to the fuming pair. Oromis went to talk with Brom, Galbatorix talked with his dead Forsworn and Shade, Shurikan hit the bar. Immediately. _Gimmie a beer._ The bartender stared at the black dragon. It was double the size of the red dragon._ Gods! I said gimmie a beer!_ Of course, to the bartender, it sounded like an angry roar. _Oh, oh crap I forgot..._ He projected his mental voice this time. _Gimmie a beer._ The bartender nodded faintly and got the beer. A rather large barrel of the stuff.

_Oh, yea, he's 'perfect'! I have a bright idea! I'm going to hatch right here in front of the mad king for the son of the Forsworn, knowing that Galbatorix will find my real name and use it! _The blue and red dragons were yet again, fighting. Glaedr did not interfere. He had tried and failed once. These two were gonna fight, and they were gonna finish. _And you're the perfect egg-chooser! You forget one little thing, the author! Who said _I _choose him! The author has something going on and he asked me to hatch there!_ Saphira snorted. That was no excuse for her. _So you obliged._ Thorn nodded. _He asked nicely and it would make the story more interesting._

Brom stared. _Oh crap, oh really bad crap. Eragon. _ "Hehe, Hi Eragon!" The old dead guy laughed nervously. "I'm playing war with Morzan. I bet Zar'roc so I may need it back. " Eragon stared. "But, but the story!" Brom and Morzan laughed. "Of course you get to use it for the story, but he likes the colors. He's not that bad out of the story." Morzan smiled and Eragon's left eye started to twitch. Morzan frowned. "Is that my son? Is he under-age drinking? I thought I put him in health ed!" Murtagh heard. "No! Crap! Dad! I'm like, twenty! No! Shit! Crap! Thorn!"

Of course, Thorn blocked his Rider out and was arguing with Saphira. Glaedr was bad-mouthing the bartender for not having green tea. Shurikan, was getting drunk. Morzan was in 'parental-mode' and called his wife over, Selena. They talked. A lot. Selena yipped. "Yay! He grew up! I think you died blah blah blah Eragon blah blah blah Garrow blah blah blah step-son!" Morzan squeeled. "Squee!!! I have a step-son!" The half-brothers joined forces to escape the doom of squealing parents. "I want a kid!" Whimpered Durza. Galbatorix patted him on the back. "I feel sorry for you..." The king sighed. "I suppose I should play mean so as to not confuse people... But I want you all to feel the love!" The Forsworn blinked. Galby added. "Or else." Everyone started hugging each-other.

Eragon panted. "You never said dad was a squealer!" He and Murtagh had ran into the authentic forest that magically appeared 'cause I'm the fan-fic author and founder of this waiting room and I say they need somewhere to run. Murtagh panted as well. "That's right, I know everything..." He sighed sarcastically. Tornac and Snowfire appeared out of nowhere. Eragon and Murtagh got on. They were tiered so they let the horses take them to the stable that was hidden in the forest. The horses grazed until Murtagh woke up. The elder brother poked his companion. "Wake up!" Eragon woke up. "I had the funniest dream..." Murtagh stared. "Dare I ask... What?" Eragon nodded. "I drempt that dad was poking us saying 'Don't come back unless you got me grand-kids!' It was scarey." Murtagh stared, wide-eyed. He slapped Eragon.

Eragon went poof. A few hours later, he came back. "Where were you?" Eragon shrugged. "Chris woke up. He wrote a scene with me in it. I had to be there." Murtagh sighed. If that was the case, Eragon would be going back and forth. A lot. Durza, still upset about dead people not being able to have kids, popped up. "I can't have a kid so lets have male-bonding!" Murtagh stared. Eragon's shirt-button started to beep. He silently thanked whatever god helped him. "That's my beeper, Chris needs me." Murtagh frowned. "Don't you dare leave me with Durza! No!" Eragon grinned and shrugged. He left. Murtagh cursed. Durza looked slightly hurt but squealed none the less. "Male-bonding!!!!!"

**If I know Murtagh, he's going to get back at Eragon** **for being left behind with Durza. They have their weapons... Hmmmmm... This might be one-shot, or two. I dunno. Depends on how much time I have, reviews, ideas, number of plot-holes for me to trip on. But, I hope Chris will write it soon. I've been reading Eragon and Eldest over and over. Eragon- 5 times, Eldest- 3**


	2. Chapter 2

1**Waiting Room II**

**Disclamer: If you really think I own everything but the idea. Congrats! You've won an enrollment to the Mental Peoples Association.**

A teen or 'young adult' as our teachers call 'em, crawled behind a tree. A big tree. Durza had problems and Eragon wasn't there to uh... suffer. He was gonna _kill_ that kid... The err... not-so-homosexual-but-not-so-heterosexual Shade peered behind a rock close to the tree. "I won't hurt you... I got a Doodle-bear art project! You know you want it Murtagh! You do, I will find you, then we an bond like gay(french gay, happy gay) school-children!" Murtagh gulped. The stained glass project was one thing, painting a black dragon-head red (Guess who...) Was fine, but he, as a man does not do Doodle-bears!

Luckily, the author chose this moment to go 'beddy bye', said action means Eragon poofed back. Snowfire was conveniently placed in front of him. The teen heard a sound that would change his life forever... Durza... He ran in one direction. Unfortunately, the scene in the book involved exercise and he was tired. Don't you love how the author places these _wonderful _times... To make things even better, Murtagh _accidentally _dropped Zar'roc on Eragon's head. The fun rolls on... "Shit..." Durza heard the sound of metal-on-head, and did that poof-thing ans poofed to wherever the 'young adults' were. "Awww, Eragon's unconscious... That means double the doodle-bear fun for Murtagh!" Murtagh developed an eye-twitch and looked at his brother's body. "You're a dead kid Eragon..."

**Cut scene as Murtagh is tied to a fence-post and forced to do doodle-bear 'fun'. It's too girly for me as I disembowel doodle-bears in my sleep.** **Watch the chainsaw run... grins**

Durza poked the un-moving body. "Shoot..." He poofed back to central waiting-room. _One less kid in the world..._ Were his thoughts. Murtagh soon regained consciousness. "Thank the gods for my play-dead lessons..." Thorn just happened to find them and Tornac looked as put-off a horse can when Murtagh mounted the red dragon. _Have you seen Saphira? _Inquired the dragon. _No, I've been playing keep-away with Durza. Oh shit..._ The red dragon sighed. _You killed Eragon didn't you?_ Murtagh gave him an innocent look. _All I did was drop Zar'roc's hilt on him!_ Thorn just shook his head. _You sadistic kid..._ Murtagh grinned.

Morzan slapped Durza. "You f---in killed 'em!" Durza grinned. "Funny story..." Selena slapped him. When Murtagh got back she slapped him again. "Damn, what was that for?!" She slapped him again. "You lied! Bad boy! Bad!" The rider and dragon looked at each other. _Want do go elsewhere?_ The dragon gave Murtagh a withering look. _Duh._ As they flew off Morzan shouted. "Stay away from alcohol! And, and no dating! Oh, and don't do drugs!" And things of that sort. Murtagh, being our favorite sadistic/emo/tough-person-type kid just ignored him. Thorn turned his head. _You'd think Morzan would be the last one to talk about drinking..._ His rider snarled. _Shut up and watch where you're driving._

Eragon, back in the forest, hem hem, thanks for picking him up Murtagh... Woke up to see a horse. Not Snowfire, it was a rather... small horse. Stubby feet, curly mane and tail, a rainbow-shaped brand on it's hindquarters, oh, and it was green. Like, mint green. "I'm Sparkles!" It said. Said, not neighed, said. In english or whatever language they speak in Alagaesia... The dreaded theme song started. _My little pony! My little pony! You'll always be in my heart!_

**Luckily, that's all I know from the commercials...**

Eragon screamed and bumped into a tree. Yes, the smart one with elf-like reflexes/speed/agility ran into a tree because Sparkles the My Little Pony said 'hi'. Smart. Eventually he really did come to. Snowfire was there. Not Sparkles, Snowfire. Despite the fact they both have eight letters in their name and both begin with 'S', the one with a better name was there. "Shit, He left... Hey look, Zar'roc!" The smart one. He picked up the sword (need I say that?) And hopped on Snowfire and went back to the actual room.

Saphira lifted a tree and sighed. Her thick-headed Rider had to be in this gods-forsaken forest...

Selena 'viciously' attacked Eragon as soon as he came into view. "Mine..." She crooned while holding Eragon with one surprisingly strong arm and stroking him with a surprisingly soft hand. Morzan back away. Nice and slow was what the therapy book had said. Well, his therapy: _When Wives Attack._ "Mom... I'm... I'm fine ya know..." His mother shushed him and carried him off. "Dad?" He asked, of course, Morzan was on a particularly good chapter and refused to get his face out of the book. (I've been endorsed by books before too. Yay!)

Elva was sitting in a corner reading. Every so often she would look up at Trianna and say something. "Did you know abhorrence means hatred?" The sorcerer would sigh. Whose bright idea was it to give the cursed babe an SAT thesaurus anyways? (Story behind that too.)

Shruikan looked at Gleadr. And vise-versa. _How's life? Pitiful? Pathetic? _Three guesses on who it was. _Psh... Both of us know you passed your 'emo' phase._ The black dragon sighed. _That didn't answer the question. _A waiter stared at the pair with utter boredom. You can't take an order if the customer doesn't project his thoughts.

Murtagh looked up. Constantly. Dang dragon flew too high and he fell unconscious. Smart move Thorn. When the dragon finally felt his Rider's lack of consciousness, he swooped down onto a cliff. Big fun, ooh, a cliff... When Murtagh woke up, he had forgotten the reason for going there. Smartness. _Shit... Why are we here again? _ The red dragon had fallen asleep. Endless joy in a bucket... The author transported Saphira to the cliff.

_Where's Eragon?_ The Rider looked up at her. _I have no idea._ Saphira snorted. _No really, where is he? _Murtagh grinned. _I'll tell you if you can carry Thorn. _Saphira looked at the sleeping lump of red scales. _You serious? _He nodded. She knocked him unconscious with her tail. _Problem fixed. _She flew off to the main room for a beer.

**Murtagh's unconscious on a cliff with a sleeping Thorn. Saphira is drinking beer. Eragon is being smothered by his mom. Shruikan and Gleadr are scaring the shit out of a waiter. Brom is losing at poker badly. **

**Note: There will be NO Mary-Sues/Gary-Stus. There are plenty of fan-fics for that stuff. Thanks for the reviews, I started this chappie once I read them but my original-idea-maker is draining and cement is filling the plot-holes. Soon this will be a shell of stuff like crackers and bird eggs.** **Au Revoir.**


	3. Unimportant Characters!

**The Waiting Room III**

**Special Un-important characters Chapter!**

**Disclaimer: If I owned it, there would be no third egg. There is so that means...(answer at bottom)**

A young man lifted his head and yawned. This was Trevor's 5th week in this thing. The author seemed not to need him anymore. He was the guy who met Brom and Eragon at Daret. He almost shot them with arrows, he talked a bit, and left. But someone had to do it right?

Nearby, a man petted his horse. "Damnit, they sold you didn't they Cadoc?" The horse-dealer, Haberth. He sold Eragon and Brom Snowfire and Cadoc back in Therinsford. They talked and haggled a bit, then, he was never put back in. But someone had to have sold them the horses.

Trevor turned his head. "What'da say?"

Haberth turned to look at the boy. "Cadoc, why?"

"That's Eragon's horse..." He muttered "I met his owner once."

"When?"

"Daret."

"They went to Daret..."

They moved to the same table to discuss each-other's encounter with Eragon. (And Brom)

A dwarf paced back and forth. He was the guy who woke Eragon when Ajihad wanted to tell him about the upcoming battle. (They didn't tell us his name so...) He felt hurt. He was given the minor job of waking the Argetlam for his meeting with Ajihad. He'd freakin' missed his soaps for that kid... (Hey, I need a reason for him to be pissed.)

Some other characters so unimportant their names weren't listed, (making it very hard for the author to write this chapter) collected into groups like at lunch or an assembly, you know, how preps will sit here, jocks there, outcasts, etc...

One of the groups quickly claimed some pool tables. Another, ping-pong.

Bottom line, the characters who were only mentioned once or twice in the books, had a party like for Honor Roll.

"Let's watch a movie!"

"Pirates of the Carribean!"

"Yay!"

Normal stuff. Some watched, others went to play something because they didn't like the movie...

The fore-mentioned dwarf went to a video game. After a while he pounded the control on the floor.

"This game cheats so bad!"

Trever and Haberth stared at the dwarf and continued to talk. Beer went fast as everyone drank their fill. Yells of joy went around as everyone felt thy were getting their due after their small, but important parts in either Eragon or Eldest.

"67!"

One of the Varden soldiers leapt up. The door prize... He came back with a shiny halberd. Useful prize eh?

An aged man walked to a corner and sat down for a drink. Dempton, the guy who invited Roran to work at his mill. He was talked about and then, he left with the main character's cousin, never to be in the books again. (Not counting when they said Roran left when he heard that the farm burned in Eldest. Whoops! Spoiler...)

"Beer..."

The miller grabbed a cold glass of liqueur.

**Short, but it's hard to write about they who I know little about. These characters just didn't do much but they were important... to a point. This will return to the original story next chappie. (Answer: I don't own it) I _do _think I'm the first to do a fic about the un-important characters though. I think... At least, I haven't seen any.**


	4. Chapter 4

**The Waiting Room IV**

_It seems that_ _I've neglected this fic after a year or so of busy, busy school and 4-H and whatnot. Unfortunately for those who dislike my plays of boredom, and_ _things of the like, I'm going to continue this fanfiction if I can, though it's a guarantee that the progress will be slow. I know how it feels to like a fic and have it just fade away, and it's not nice._ _I can safely say that after a year of roleplaying, I have improved my grammatical skills as well as spelling and vocabulary, not that anything will be perfect, rather I know that I'll have mistakes. _

_This is me, not owning the Inheritance Cycle, or anything related to it. I also do not claim ownership of any other things that may appear along throughout this fanfiction._

The day was good and over, and all the little unimportant characters had been once more neatly packaged in a nice, organized pattern within the depths of a cardboard box. However, these poor things were not really so much as unimportant as supporting people who's roles were finished. All was well, at the exception of a certain Rider-and-dragon couple who were still out cold, one sleeping, the other unconscious. Yes indeed, Murtagh and Thorn were both laying on the ridge where Saphira had left them. Eragon was somewhere out in the Forest of Magical Hell, as it had been dubbed by a frantic Selena and Morzan. The latter was sorely disappointed at how horribly his plans for 'male bonding' had failed, and was now desperately cringing and flailing beneath his wife's wrath. Ah, how the tables have turned. The longest surviving Forsworn who, as Ajihad described, was more beast then man, was no longer using dear Selena as a tool or spy. "Men!" cried the frenzied woman, pacing like a caged beast who wasn't at all keen to remain locked up.

"Honey, I'm sorry, I tried to- " whined the once-feared man as he raised his hands over his head in an attempt to shield himself. He was cut off as a plank of wood, torn off from the side of the bar much the tender's distress, rapped against his head swiftly and sharply. It was apparent that the worried mother was not in the mood for excuses, and that all she wanted was for her two dear boys to return. She obviously didn't know what they had become.

_Damnit, Murtagh! _Roared the crimson beast, tail lashing furiously behind his massive form. The ruby dragon had finally awaken from his slumber, and yet the pure muscle and bone withing the blue animal's tail had knocked out Thorn's Rider nice and proper. Murtagh was not yet conscious, and his loyal friend did not know why. Thorn was apparently a very deep sleeper, and had not discovered just who had caused this state in his human.

Weak, tired, and about to explode, the younger of the two siblings felt like wailing with fatigue. The only thing that prevented him from doing so was his damned ego. He was a Dragon Rider, not a child, and he was supposed to be strong. Well, since he couldn't whine, he decided that he might as well blame things around him. _Stupid trees, _he thought with a grim frown. _This is a waiting _room_, not a waiting forest! Where am I? Why hasn't Saphira found me? _Questions and riddles rattled his mind, not at all improving his mood.

What the hell was that? The poppy-hued dragon shifted his serpentine neck and slid closer to his friend. Why wouldn't Murtagh wake up? Something was out there, and experience told Thorn that you should assume the worst. He let loose a bellowing roar, his head lifting to the skies as his throat vibrated, thumping back and forth.

"Holy crap, who's there?!" shouted Eragon, who had not had the same kind of experience as the ruby beast.

What was that? A human voice, familiar, but hard to place for sure. Younger than his Rider, high-pitched and by far more whiney. He didn't need to really think very hard at all before realizing who it was. The monster turned, blinking, as a woozy brunette tumbled into the clearing. Thorn had to question his condition, the kid was tottering worse than a drunk on a sailboat. The dragon, quite honestly, couldn't think of a reason to care, though.

Of course, it was then when both the ruby beast and his unconscious friend were 'poofed' away by the hand of the writer, leaving a startled Eragon behind.

"Guys...?"

He was frickin' lost, wasn't he?

_I'm lame, I'm lame, I'm lame._ _I don't even know if I should leave this story here. I'm a horrible writer, and even worse with this kind of thing. Ooi vey._ _I don't really need much reviews, because quite honestly, I'm not sure I even want to continue this thing. I don't know why, but I find it more entertaining to roleplay on Furcadia. Lulz. So for now, I'm gonna hiatus this. Have fun with life. I guess. Whoo._


End file.
